I Am Not A Morning Person

I was awakened early this morning by the dulcet screams of Master Lonie demanding some food and attention. Inappropriate as it may seem, given our geographical location (but perhaps not so strange, given our PM’s heart’s desire), Good Morning America was on, the hosts blathering on about riots and hold-ups triggered by the release of the latest over-hyped video game console, because apparently the geeks have determined the rate of obsolescence means waiting twenty-four hours to play the newest sex-life substitute game is just unacceptable.

Hearing a faint but persistent noise coming from outside, I realised with displeasure that it was the dawn chorus. Thoroughly grumpy now and keen to get back to bed, I was not impressed when GMA chose that moment to chime in with its weather theme song, sung with the kind of jaunty beat that only exacerbated the taunting nature of the inane lyrics:

“How does it feel to be up with the sun?
Start your day on the run? Whoa whoa yeah…”

How does it feel? It feels like SHUT YOUR FACE!

I am not a morning person.